Question 1

Who might benefit from spiritual direction?

Accepted Answer

My first thought is a Calvin & Hobbes cartoon.  
Calvin is sitting at a desk with the message:
			"a swift kick in the butt, $1"
Hobbes asks "How's business?"
Calvin answers, "Terrible.  I don't understand it.  Everyone needs what I am selling."

At some point in everyone's life, they need to answer the most fundamental questions in life: "Who am I?" and "Who is God?"  I think these questions and their answers are interwoven.  And spiritual direction is kinda a "kick in the butt" in the direction of God.
The answer to the questions "Who might benefit from spiritual direction?" is everyone.
But to be more specific ...

Someone 
... who wants to talk about his or her relationship with God
... searching for the spiritual
... experiencing confusion
... suffering affliction
... angry with God
... or happy with God
Someone
... questioning God
... with questions about theology and/or the Bible
... struggling with prayer
... experiencing dryness
... immersed in darkness
... experimenting with different forms of prayer
Someone
... engaged in spiritual warfare
... unsure if he or she is motivated by the Holy Spirit or another spirit
... who wants to deepen his or her relationship with God
... at a crossroads in life
... asking who am I?

Question 2

Is there an essential characteristic I need for spiritual direction?

Accepted Answer

Yes, and the answer might be a surprise.  You need a sense of humor.  If we cannot laugh, we cannot live.
If you are struggling to laugh because of tragedy or depression or sufferings, don't worry, we will get there in time.

Question 3

What if I am spiritual but not religious?

Accepted Answer

That's okay with me.

Question 4

What if our religions hold different tenants?

Accepted Answer

There is something universal about the spiritual life, and that common ground is a broad plain.   I have no interest in theological debates.  That is not what spiritual direction is about.

Question 5

Why should I choose you?

Accepted Answer

Good question.  
     I hope many concerns have been allayed in this question and answer section.  I would only add that I have knowledge and experience.
     For example ...
     I met with a group of young adults who were doing a consecration to Mary.  John Paul II did it and said it changed his life.  I did it.  These young adults were doing it.  They seemed naive and arrogant.  I said, "There's going to be a test at the end.  Are you ready for it."  They laughed my comment away.
     Several months later, a woman from the group contacted me.  Immediately after the consecration, the group fell apart, and the members developed dislike for each other.  The woman wanted to speak to me because she thought I would be "the only one who would understand."  We talked about a lot of things, and she told me things she had never told any one.  
     This same consecration changed Pope John Paul II's life.  O course, he had spiritual wisdom and a spiritual director.
   This has happened to me many times: people wanting to talk to me and telling me things they have never told anyone, because of my experience in both the light and the darkness.
     I have knowledge and experience.

Question 6

Why are you a spiritual director?

Accepted Answer

Even when I was a seminarian, people started to ask me for spiritual direction.  
     In my first year as a priest, a woman asked me, "How did someone so young become so wise?"  I answered, "Long-suffering."  
     I have always prayed for wisdom.  Throughout my life, prayer for wisdom has predominated.
     Without going into all the details, I experienced a deep, deep darkness and great brokenness, and my recovery has taken years.  Several recent events have prompted me to take up spiritual direction again.
     I do not think anyone should take up spiritual direction on their own.  The call must come from without and within.  In my case, both have occurred for a second time in my life.

Question 7

Do you have a favored spirituality?

Accepted Answer

Yes.  While I have studied many spiritualities, I have always had an attraction to the desert fathers and mothers who lived in the 2nd and 3rd centuries and to the Carmelites.  The quote on the welcome page of this website is from one of the desert fathers, and Edith Stein is one of my favorite saints.  I do not impose my spiritual predilections on others.  Everyone gets to choose their own favorite spirituality.

Question 8

What are you reading now?

Accepted Answer

I am reading Strength in Darkness, the Wisdom of John of the Cross.

Question 9

Are you ecumenical?

Accepted Answer

Yes.  I was raised a Methodist but became Catholic.  And not just a Catholic but a Catholic priest.  As a Catholic priest, I oversaw the largest ecumenical fundraiser for the hungry in Colleton County.  I often preached at and visited Protestant communities.  While chaplain at The Citadel, I promoted ecumenical activities of all kinds including an ecumenical Ash Wednesday service.  I am happy to work with anyone.

Question 10

Are you still a Catholic priest?

Accepted Answer

Well, yes and no.  Sacramentally, I will always be a ministerial priest.  The Sacrament of Holy Orders is one of three indelible sacraments.  I left the Catholic Church because of the abuses of power.  I am not anti-Catholic by any means.  I am anti-abuse.

Question 11

Do you have a spiritual director?

Accepted Answer

Yes.  Spiritual directors must have spiritual directors.  We are all in this together.

Question 12

How do you pray?

Accepted Answer

I love the psalms.  I pray other parts of the Bible but always come back to the psalms.  I even published a book on psalm 110, which I consider the most important psalm in the canon.  I am inspired by reading the prophets.  I ask the saints and angels to pray for me.  I need all the help I can get.  I often light an olive oil lamp.  I also blow my shofar.

Question 13

Have you found the answer?

Accepted Answer

What's the question?  I am not being cheeky.  I am being honest.  I am not a saint, not a paragon.  I am a sinner who struggles to live in a relationship with God.  I am now and always will be a pilgrim who needs help from other pilgrims and helps other pilgrims.  Do not put me on a pedestal.  I will fall off.

Question 14

What is your religion?

Accepted Answer

I am a Christian-Catholic.

Question 15

What is the difference between a counselor and a spiritual director?

Accepted Answer

A counselor focuses on psychological problems.  A spiritual director focuses on the relationship with God.  These can be and often are interrelated.  A good counsellor and a good spiritual director know their boundaries.  Often, I have advised people to seek counseling as an adjunct or as a replacement for spiritual direction.  I know what problems and when problems are outside of my area of expertise.

Question 16

Do you proselytize?

Accepted Answer

Heck no.  Spiritual direction is not about converting someone to a particular religion.

Question 17

Will you work with anyone?

Accepted Answer

Yes, I will be happy to work with anyone in any spiritual state.  I'd even love to work with an atheist who seeks the spiritual.  That would be interesting.  But because I was in ministry for twenty years and know both the challenges and the heartaches, if I had my druthers, I would love to serve those who serve others in ministry, whether that ministry is formal or informal.  I also know how hard it is to find a spiritual director, much less a good one.

Question 18

How much does it cost and how long will we meet?

Accepted Answer

I charge $75 for a 50 minutes session.

Question 19

Where and how do we meet?

Accepted Answer

Since ninety percent of human communication is non-verbal, I prefer meeting in person.  Walking outside gets the blood flowing , puts us in nature, and gives us a different perspective.  If meeting in person, we might sit outside, walk around downtown Mitchell, South Dakota or walk around Lake Mitchell.  If we live far apart, we can talk on the phone or use Zoom or Skype.

Question 20

How do we start?

Accepted Answer

If you have made it this far, you are already on the journey.  Kudos.
I like to begin with a thirty-minute, free-of-charge conversation.  This gives us a chance to begin to get to know each other.  We both need to feel comfortable and begin to establish a relationship of trust.  Then, if we are both ready to move forward, I will send a link to an intake form, we will set up a first meeting time and arrange payments.
To contact me for a brief consultation, click here.